Between pandemic lockdown mode and parenting, I took out a lot of aggression drilling into available rocks. I offer them on my
Etsy store , they’re all pocket size waterproof and fireproof. simonearth
Pet Rocks that Rock
Here at the Pet Rock Adoption Agency we rehabilitate, restore and re-home small stones. These rocks are found objects, chunks of river rock and industrial aggregate, cleaned and groomed with diamond coated drill bits.
Instead of gluing on googly eyes, these pet rocks are lowbrow gag gift meets reductive minimalism.
there’s also this
TikTok channel! I’m expanding my cast of characters and angles.
This is the tiniest little pet rock! It’s also a shark, look out! Edith is good at keeping secrets. Deacon the pet rock is always carrying around a nice set of tools. Sandra comes from Old Money, but her family fell on hard times in the early 1990’s. Bridget has been spending lots of time doing laundry. Charlie loves Scandanavian folk music. Pet Rocks that Rock by Simonearth
Haley is the best dancer! Arthur’s etsy store now features Pet Rocks in the style of minimalism Trent doesn’t respond to anyone’s social media friend requests. Jasmine started an online apparel business that recently got sold to a Japanese investment group at SoftBank. Not sure how much she made, but hot damn! Eduardo has dreams of being a competitive cowboy. “Pollard comes back every morning with makeup smeared all over him, I don’t even ask.” Neville has a large collection of stamps, all handmade. Nardo can beat you at Madden ’12 with his eyes closed. Morgan has been divorced three times, all by accident. Mister Gum was discovered wandering in downtown Dallas, he’s not sure how he got there. McDugan knows all the stars in the sky, even when it’s cloudy out. Nobody’s sure whose MawMaw she is, but she’s someone’s MawMaw. Hillsboro is a piece of jasper from Washington state who never learned how to swim. H is a Hilton, but not the one you’re thinking. Hasslebeck always shows up for meetings with fresh donuts. Gladstone has been shooting at the squirrels trying to get at the birdseed. Gabrielle is on the land line phone, all the time. Figgy has a high shrill voice and looks kind of purple in the light. Erin has some really interesting textures, it comes from having an excellent skin care regimen. Dr. Grumbles is a very small pet rock, he is very old and draws a pension from the state. Delicate Guy is very fragile, both physically and emotionally. He would prefer a home without children. Nobody has really asked where Astrid came from, we may have misplaced her papers, hold on…